As we have learned how much media can affect our kids, let’s look at some practical signs that can tell us who influences your teens, you or them (media, friends, others besides you)?

Just listen for statements made by your teen like; “Johnny is doing it”, “I have to have it”, “Lisa is wearing it, I should be able to too”, etc. Words like these are warning signs that someone else besides you has their heart. Whoever owns their heart will have the most influence on them. Who ever we spend the most time with we become. But, it is not too late.

“Parents, you are the ones to intervene in your teen’s lives to keep them from being pulled away by the culture. To so this, you need to develop a “heart meter” for your kids by watching for the signs [statements like above]-even when they are young. Watch who owns your kids’ heart and mind, in each stage of growth, and who they get validation from. When you start to see signs that you kids care about their friends or what the culture thinks more than what you think, it should be an indicator for you to “lean into them more”. When I say this, I don’t mean that you should point your finger at them and say, “This is the way it’s going to be.” You have to lean into them relationally. You need to woo their hearts back from the culture or their friends so that you are their touchstone. You are the one they go to for advice and direction. But it takes constant monitoring of who owns your teen’s heart.” [Luce 67]

Lets watch and pursue them, spend as much time with them as possible, they do want to spend time with you, especially if you are interested in what they do and who they are. You are loved. _pastor tim