I came across this statement reading 7 Habbits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey and I thought it was permanent to all us parents.

“When parents see their children’s problems as opportunities to build the relationship instead of as negative, burdensome irritations, it totally changes the nature of parent-child interaction. Parents become more willing, even excited, about deeply understanding and helping their children. When a child comes to them with a problem, instead of thinking, “Oh, no! Not another problem!” their paradigm is, “here is a great opportunity for me to really help my child and to invest in our relationship.” Many interactions change from transactional to transformational and strong bonds of love and trust are created as children sense the value parents give to their problems and to them as individuals.”

 you are loved

_pastor tim

Hey all. Just got back from spring break with some amazing UTURNers, class of '09.  We spent a week camping on Pismo beach. Minus the rain, it was an amazing time. I was blown-away at the depth, honesty, openness, insight-fullness and contemplation from this incredible group. We laughed (too hard almost, the park rangers had to come by), we cried, we made some great memories in our time together. Some of  your kids just had spring break too, I hope that you had the opportunity to make some fun memories with them as well.

In Ron Luce's book, RE-CREATE, he talks about the memories we make with our children. Not just the fun, amazing family moments, but the memories of what our children experience in our homes with us. Good, bad or ugly, what we do makes memories for our kids. Though Ella is only 10 months now, I was already seeing how a busy and demanding schedule was competing with making those special memories with my girls (my wife, Pam, and Ella). Making memories doesn't have to be costly, extravagant or time consuming. In RE-CREATE, Luce gives plenty examples of some great memory-makers that we can do at home. Like...

-late-night jacuzzi talks; soothing after a long day and great opportunity to talk with your teens

-reading together

-having a regular family night-including games, movies, dinner, a walk--whatever you and your family find fun together...have a PJ night together or guitar-hero night, or an 80's night (nothing breaks down barriers like dad wearing rolled sleeves and stonewashed jeans, and mom in big hair and neon make-up)   

-camping out in the back yard

-picking your teen up from school just to take them to lunch, as a surprise

and if none of those sound good to your teen, just ask them what they'd like to do...

Everyday we are making memories, I'd like to look back and say that we made some great ones, on-purpose.

you are loved,

_pastor tim